A Personal Note on TBRI: Why do I believe in TBRI?
TBRI® works. I have seen the transformation that has taken place in families, and I believe it works because it actually addresses the whole person by honoring the child’s history and their needs, while giving the child a voice. Dr. Purvis once said, “our children were harmed in relationships, and they will come to experience healing through nurturing relationships.” Whether our kids come into our care biologically, through foster-care, adoption, or in professional settings, each one has a story. It is important that we know those stories and how those stories have impacted each child because the behaviors we see in our kids are most often in response to the experiences they have had early in life.
Deep down at the core of who we are and how we were created, we long for and need trusting relationships, and at the heart of relationships is connection.
When was the last time you felt connected to someone? Where you really felt seen, known, heard, and cherished. It is that desire and capacity to connect and relate that is one of the most fundamental aspects of being human that sets us apart from other creatures. God wired us to connect with each other, and we see the distortion of this good need and desire all throughout culture and society, including the church, where we find issues such as social media obsession, sex, porn, etc. running rampant. At the core of such issues is a desire to feel connected. Ultimately, we can only fully fill that deep void through a relationship with Christ. However, the Lord did give us the beautiful gift of relationships with other human beings, which reflect something of the glory and goodness which the Lord has within Himself, as a triune God. Not only is the God we serve relational in and of Himself, but He also demonstrates His love for us in that He went to hell and back to restore our relationship with Him. What we see throughout Scripture is clear: the Lord fervently and continuously pursues connection with His people — both when they are worshipping him and when they are running away from him. David, in Psalm 139, gives us a picture of this never-ending never-giving-up kind of love when he asks the Lord, “Where shall I go from your Spirit? Or where shall I flee from your presence? If I ascend to heaven, you are there! If I make my bed in Sheol, you are there! If I take the wings of the morning and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, even there your hand shall lead me, and your right hand shall hold me.” Praise Jesus that we can never get away from this God, who tells us that there is nothing that can separate us from His love (Romans 8).
Just as our heavenly Father does that with each of us, shouldn’t we also be doing the same with the children in our care?
At the heart of TBRI® is connection. It seeks to connect through engagement and play; it seeks to connect through building healthy trusting safe relationships; it seeks to connect through practicing mindfulness and attuned presence within relationships; it seeks to connect through teaching how to give and receive nurturing care; it seeks to connect through empowering and honoring the body’s needs for emotional and physiological regulation by creating an environment that is emotionally-regulating, in which the child feels safe, and gets proper nutrients, exercise, and appropriate sensory stimulation; it seeks to connect by disarming fear-based behaviors and correct through teaching and modeling proactive and responsive strategies without shame or fear, offering re-dos, choices, and compromises.
This is what I love about TBRI®: it honors the dignity of our stories; it pursues connection and relationship above all else; and through its’ principles and tools it creates a pathway to experience healing, learning, and growth.
If you or your child seems like they could benefit from this type of care, you can contact me, Jordan Brand, certified TBRI® practitioner, at firstname.lastname@example.org.
If you would like further information, here is a link to a video further describing TBRI®: https://youtu.be/FWScSJKjn1A
Jordan works at Life Counseling Center Ministries, Roland Park location. She has her masters degree in counseling from Covenant Theological Seminary and is an LGPC. She has TBRI training from Texas Christian University’s Karyn Purvis Institute of Child Development. This training equips her to help children who struggle with fear-based behaviors due to trauma and connect them to the promises of God’s word. If you think your child could benefit from meeting with Jordan call our offices today to schedule or email her at email@example.com.